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Brianna Gina Berthelet
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Roses are red,
Our spirits are blue,
We wanted so much,
To share life with you.
Although you are gone,
Gone far, far away,
You dwell in our hearts,
Where forever you'll stay.
May 21st, 2005
A month has passed since my baby was taken from me...
I look at her pictures, her lock of hair, the urn that her ashes are in...
I walk into her bedroom where her stroller sits unused, where her teddy bears sit unloved, where her bouncy chair sits but does not bounce...
I hold her clothes up to my face and breathe in, closing my eyes and imagining that she is wearing them...
I put baby lotion on the back of my hand to have the familiar smell near me as I move around the house, tidying up the things that I did not have time for when she was alive, things that do not seem important now that she is dead...
I wonder how I will make it through today, then tomorrow and then the day after that...
Brianna, tell God that Mommy and Daddy don't understand...how are we supposed to live without you after learning what it was like to have you in our lives?
My dear Brianna,
Over two months have passed since you left us and we still cannot understand why you had to go. We had waited for you for so long, and you were well worth the wait, but you were robbed of a lifetime here on earth.
Daddy and I are glad that we got to meet you and love you for five weeks. We love you, we miss you, and you are always in our hearts and prayers.
Love from your Mommy forever.
Dear Brianna,
It has now been three months since you went to be with God and all the other little angels. I continue to think of you every waking hour and pray that one night I will dream of holding you in my arms. Your Daddy and I miss you so much and talk about you all the time, "If Brianna were here we would be walking with her in her stroller", "I wonder if Brianna would have slept on the way up North", "Do you think Brianna would have enjoyed being in the pool?"
It is so hard to be without you but one day we will see you again.
We miss you SO much and love you more than anything.
Love from your Mommy forever.
Dear Brianna,
Four months have passed since we last looked into your bright eyes, how I miss those beautiful eyes! Daddy and I continue to wonder about what you would be like now, you'd be 5 months old and oh so different than when we last saw you. We never got to see your first smile but I pray that you are now smiling in heaven and watching over all of us, especially your Auntie G (she misses you SOO much!) We love you, we miss you, and you are ALWAYS in our hearts.
Love from your Mommy forever
xxxxx
My dear Brianna,
Five months have passed since I last held you and kissed your sweet face. I continue to think about you every minute of every waking hour. Daddy and I are excited about the new pregnancy that you and God blessed us with. We are so grateful to you! I hope and pray that your sibling is born healthy and strong (like you were!) and that he or she will live a long and happy life with you as his or her beautiful guardian angel.
I love you, I miss you and you are always in my heart and thoughts.
Love from your Mommy forever.
xxxxx
It has now been six months since we lost you, baby girl. The quantity of tears I shed has lessened but my love for you can only continue to grow stronger. Athough I feel lonely without you I never feel 'alone' because I know you are always by my side. You were there in the hospital room the other day when the ultrasound technician told us we were having a girl, Auntie G and I saw you in the sunshine that lit up the room. And I know you will be there with Mommy and Daddy when I deliver your sister next March.
Please take care of your Daddy, he misses you a lot and needs you to help him be strong.
I love you, I miss you, and you are always in my heart and thoughts.
Your Mommy forever.
xxxxx
Seven months ago our hearts broke when you left us. You were the light of our lives and the perfect addition to our family. I miss you every day and pray to God each night that He takes care of you and makes sure you are happy in heaven. How I wish it was me holding you instead of Him!
Christmas is coming and it is hard to see the little Christmas dresses that you will never wear and all the toys that I will never buy for you. Please watch over me and Daddy and give us the strength to go on without you.
I love you, I miss you, and you are always in my heart and thoughts.
Love from your Mommy forever.
xxxxxxx
It has now been 8 months since your death. Christmas is only days away, I wish you were here to celebrate with Daddy and me, though it won't be a celebration without you. I am sending you hugs and kisses... Merry Christmas in Heaven, my sweet baby girl... I LOVE YOU.
Your sad Mommy...
xxxxxxxx
My dearest Brianna,
Nine months ago we said goodbye to your little body and began our lives with only the memories of your time here on earth to give us comfort. It is a difficult journey and we continue to miss you each and every day. Coming into 2006 was especially difficult as Mommy felt she was leaving you, her sweet baby girl, behind in 2005, the only year that you lived in. Daddy has assured me that you will always be with us... no matter the time or place (and I know he's right!).
I love you, I miss you, and you are always in my heart and prayers.
Your Mommy forever.
xxxxxxxxx
My dear Brianna,
If SIDS had not taken you away from us 10 months ago, you would now be 11 months old, you'd be such a big girl! I wonder if you would still look like Daddy or if you would have started to look like me. I wonder what colour your hair would be now...it was so dark and growing so fast! I wonder what your character would be like...sociable like your Daddy or quiet like your Mommy (I think you would have been like me...) I wonder how we would be spending our days together...would you like going to visit Liam, Nathan and Madison? They would be your playmates...if you were still here. I wonder which of the dogs would be your favorite...gentle Calista or excitable Georgia (they both would love you SO much).
I love you, baby girl, and I miss you SO much each and every day.
Love from your Mommy forever.
xxxxxxxxxx
It has now been 11 months since I last held you, so much has happened since then! We now have a new baby in our lives, your little sister, Melayna. Sometimes when I look down at her as she feeds at my breast I can't help but think she looks just like you...though she has her own characteristics and appearance. How I wish that you were here too! Our family would be complete again...
I love you, I miss you, you are forever in my heart, and forever my first-born daughter.
Love from your Mommy forever.
xxxxxxxxxxx
One year ago today we experienced the worst day of our lives. We awoke to find the lifeless body of our precious baby girl. I remember everything as though it happened only seconds ago. Our hearts broke and our world, as we knew it, ceased to exist. I asked your Daddy over and over again, 'what are we going to do!?'
Well, what we've had to do is go on... your little sister Melayna now fills our empty arms but there is an empty spot in our hearts, where you used to be, that will never be filled.
We continue to miss you every day and love you today as much as the day you were born, if not more!!!
Mommy and Daddy love you and miss you and you are forever in our hearts.
Love from your Mommy forever
xx